Dr. Laura,
I discovered you this past summer on the radio as I would drive to and from the gym; I had just graduated from college and was taking the summer to spend time with family before heading to London - where I am now studying Intellectual History on a fully-funded fellowship.
I love, love, love being part of the Dr. Laura Family... I listen to the podcasts every day when I run on the treadmill and walk to class. I have used what I learn from you in countless situations when counseling friends/parents/siblings and always citing my sources and giving you credit!
My parents are each other's second spouses, married for 24 years. My dad has sometimes said his family, and his unwillingness to confront their problems, partly caused the disintegration of his first marriage... My parents broke off all communication with that paternal extended family when I was 3-years-old - the family was a motley mix of alcoholics, perverts, cokeheads, and was abusive to my parents, especially my father, in more ways than I will ever know. I listened to one of your podcasts in which you said that a husband who's lived with his family's terrible behavior for years is unlikely to change and unlikely to give it all up for a wife, that such a man was one in a million. I got on Skype with my dad after hearing that and told him how proud I was of him for being that one in a million. I told him how profoundly happy and indebted I am to his and my mom's decision to forego additional financial security and the allure of a perfect family, in order to shield me and my sister from true sources of evil. I told him I can only imagine the environment we would have been in and suffered from had they not been courageous enough to follow-through on what they saw and knew to be wrong. Suffice it to say he was extremely moved.
I feel such pain whenever I hear parents on your podcast unwilling to address abuse in extended families to children, because I know that could have been my fate. My parents made the tough choice necessary to give me a happy childhood. So what that I don't have grandparents, cousins, uncles, aunts. Any successes I have in life will be due in part to the environment of absolute love, support, and safety my parents created from a situation full of wrong. Now that I'm grown up, I know they created it and I love them ever more. And even if I know firsthand their marriage isn't perfect, they have provided, in their second marriages, a great model for me.
Thank you for your advocacy; thank you for becoming a voice inside my head, alongside my parents; and thank you for inadvertently leading me to a place of greater love and respect for my mom and dad.
Best,
Sarah
