Dr. Laura,
My wife and I went through some serious head bashing several years ago regarding finances. We solved the problem by separating our finances and 'keeping our noses out of each others business.'
I thought this was working famously until I mentioned that I intended to fly first class on our upcoming vacation trip. I saw a change in my wife's eyes for a moment. She said, "Well, I'll be back in coach. I just can't afford first class." Then she walked away. I knew something was wrong. When I asked her what, she started crying. She said she really wanted to 'hold up her end of the bargain' but couldn't afford first class. I said, "Honey, I'll take care of you."
She put her arms around me, put her head against my chest and said, "I'd like that. I'm so tired of taking care of everything myself. I like it when you take care of me."
I have never heard more uplifting words from anyone in my life. At the risk of stealing lines from movies, she 'makes me want to be a better man.' We've both been through first marriages. We've both been through tough times. My new goal is to provide for the essentials so she can work if she wants to but doesn't have to work to support our lifestyle. I feel a greater sense of purpose, find myself more focused and feel more loved that I have in many, many years.
R.
