Parenting

QUEEN OF YOUR CASTLE By Cheryl Gochnauer Once upon a time, there was a fair princess who, though she was beautiful(especially in her parents' eyes), was very confused. Her mother, thequeen, loved the castle and was content to raise her family within itswalls. But everyday rabble-rousers outside the castle banged on the gatesand tossed rocks with messages tied round them into the courtyard. Theprincess would untie the messages and read them:"The queen is wasting her life, just staying in the castle with you and theyoung princes." "Princess, the queen is a coward. Or maybe she's just lazy. Then again, Ibet she's not very smart. Because brave, busy and bright queens leave theircastles and become part of the real world." "I can't believe how selfish the queen is. She makes your father, the king,work like a serf to take care of her while she watches Oprah the Great spintales all day." The princess, who up until this time had been happy to play in the castlewith her brothers and the queen, began to mope. "If the queen would get ajob outside the castle, my life would be so much better," she thought."There would be money for more toys, I could play with other kids all day atWee Royal Daycare, and the queen could drive me about in a brand-newcarriage." The king noticed the princess pouting, and beckoned her to him. "What's thematter, Child?" he asked as she crawled up in his lap. When the princesstold him about her plight, the king realized it was time for a royal chat.He beckoned the princes and the queen, and the entire royal family gatheredto hear his words. "Alas," the king began, "I fear a plague has entered the castle grounds,transported here by the rocks thrown over the castle walls. It isaffluenza, a dangerous and fast-growing affliction that brings sorrow toalmost every family it infects. "Affluenza's victims are stricken with a warped perception of true wealth,"the king explained. "Instead of valuing what they have, they want more.They trade their time for things, and then have no time to enjoy the thingsthey've traded for. "Princess, don't you like to play with the queen and the princes?" he asked.She nodded. "Well, if you spend from 7 a.m. until 6 p.m. everyday in WeeRoyal Daycare, you won't have much time to play with the queen. And sinceWee Royal Daycare doesn't take princes under 2 years old, you'll beseparated from your youngest brother, too." The princess scooted a littlecloser to the baby prince. "With the gold the queen made from working outside the castle, we couldafford to buy the new carriage," the king acknowledged. "But you wouldn'tspend much time in it, except driving back and forth to Wee Royal Daycare.And new carriages cost so much, there wouldn't be much money left over fornew toys, either." "It's nice having the queen around to help you learn and answer questions,isn't it?" the king asked. "At Wee Royal Daycare, there are nice teachers,too. But with one teacher to ten children, they are very busy, and what'simportant to you and the queen isn't always important to them." "Tell me what you saw the queen doing today at the castle," the king said. "Let's see," the princess thought. "She cleaned the castle, bartered withshop owners, washed and mended our clothing. She soothed the baby prince,counseled the teen prince, and helped me with my letters. Then she preparedthe feast, and listened to you talk about fighting dragons outside thecastle." "The queen doesn't sound lazy or scared or dumb to me," observed the king. "She's wonderful," cried the princess, as she threw her arms around thequeen. "Yes, she is," said the king. "And I should have let you know I thought soearlier. Sometimes I get so busy fighting dragons, I forget to say how muchI appreciate her creating a safe haven inside the castle. "Princess, there's a wide, often whimsical world beyond these walls. Youhave many choices of what you might do with your life when you grow up. Butno matter what you do, remember that simply becoming queen of your castle isa noble choice." (Cheryl Gochnauer is queen of her castle in Kansas City, Missouri. You may write her at Cheryl@homebodies.org , or visit her website at www.homebodies.org . Her book, " So You Want to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom ," isavailable through Dr. Laura#146;s Reading Corner . Copyright2001 Homebodies.Org, LLC. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com.)