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Blog: Stop Making Excuses and Start Being a Girlfriend

Written by Dr. Laura | 9/2/24 8:45 AM
Kimberly was bummed about her husband’s physique when she called me. He had let exercise go, focusing more on work and family. He was becoming soft and mushy while she was still active and fit. “Sometimes when I look at him, I just go, ‘yuck,’” she said.
 

Listen to Kimberly's Call of the Day podcast episode:

 

I told her he would take better care of himself if he had a girlfriend. “Remember being his girlfriend?” I asked. “What were some ways you treated him back then?”

 

Kimberly said, “I was definitely more physically affectionate, I would hold his hand, rub his back, initiate sex, tell him I loved him, tell him that I appreciated the things he was doing.”

 

She had the solution to her problem. She just didn’t realize how much power she had to turn things around. What we women want, our men want to give us. They want to make us happy. They want to impress us. They want us to be proud of them. But, if we stop being their girlfriends, they lose their motivation. That’s why I talk about keeping the 4 A’s of a relationship alive: appreciation, affection, attention and affirmation.

 

Aging happens to us all. We need love to carry us through. If you have a good husband who you love, reward him. A lot of women don’t have good men. Don’t waste yours.