March 26, 2012Tired Husband's List
Dear Dr. Laura
I have been married 19 years have 7 and 12 year old daughters. My wife is a stay at home Mom. I have given up on being happy in my marriage for many of the reasons you are constantly dealing with on your program. My wife constantly asks me "what is wrong?" I just say "I am tired" I cannot tell her, I have tried and it falls on deaf ears so I wrote this list. I have not given it to her but maybe you can give it to the millions of married women that listen to your show.
1) I'm tired of fighting to have the kids eat a banana for a snack instead of ice cream, or something little like turning unused lights off.
2) I'm tired of being told I don't do enough around the house that I work to pay for us to live in. I do help, "enough" - I just don't know what "enough" means.
3) I'm tired of working late only to come to bed with a dog and child in my place.
4) I'm tired of 90% of my opinions being belittled, criticized or dismissed and then being told I never want to talk.
5) I'm tired of being told we never talk.
6) I'm tired of being told "that's what it takes" when it comes to household expenditures with no thought given to "that's what we have".
7) I'm tired of living in what amounts to a "strip club," where you see a naked woman, but can't touch her.
8) I'm tired of my "tone" of my words trumping my "content" of them.
9) I'm tired of being told "stop talking to your daughter as if she is a teenager" and now that she is close to being a teenager living a level of disrespect no adult should have to suffer at the hands of a "tween."
10) I'm tired of my spouse more worried about the "details of life" rather than "living life"
11) I'm tired of my few interests in life being made fun of and belittled / called unimportant.
12) I 'm tired of having the first thing come out of her mouth when I wake up, or get home, is what is wrong with our lives.
13) I'm tired of my family having no concept of what it takes to keep us in the place we are in this world, but only complaining about what is missing.
14) Finally, I'm tired of fighting my desire to leave, and not be "tired" anymore. This would surely destroy my children, and cuts to the core of what I think a good man is: one who doesn't care how hard life is because responsibility comes first. So I am going to be miserable, stay.. and continue to be "tired."
Posted by Staff at 2:00 PM