My Teen Is Shy
December 18, 2012
My Teen Is Shy

Oh, hi.  Sorry, I didn't get this done in time [wiping off inside of car trunk].  This is my new Dodge Challenger; very retro.  All right [grabs papers].  You know, people forget to clean in here [motions to inside of trunk].  You've got to get in here and then you can really see all of the recesses.  I mean, look at that [runs finger along outer rim of trunk and there's dust]; that's not good.  And let's see what else might not be good...

Welcome to our YouTube channel.  I'm Dr. Laura Schlessinger and I answer your questions.  This one's from Jessica:

"My daughter is 15, and, like most teens is concerned with the social aspect of high school.  [Yeah]   She is shy and feeling overwhelmed with not being outgoing enough.

I told her that it takes getting out of your comfort zone a little at a time. [That's a very good piece of advice.]  People are always interested in talking about themselves. [Gosh knows.]  So I suggested she ask about others to drive the conversations, because the more she does this, the easier it gets.

Would you have any other words of advice to help me help her get over her shyness?"

Well, first of all, everybody's got a different personality and some people are just more outgoing and gregarious than others, but I think it really is very wise of you to give her tips on how to handle situations.  And yeah, the number one way to make people like you is to show you're interested in them. 

Also you should suggest that she do things in teeny weenie little groups.  Like have one or two girls come over and have them do a "something"...anything from charity, going over to some elderly person's house and cleaning up for them, or selling Girl Scout cookies or whatever it is...just doing little things in little groups.  If she's overwhelmed by trying to get accepted into a big clique, I don't blame her; so was I.  I don't think I've ever gotten over that. 

I can stand in front of 20,000 people and give a talk, but if I get into a room with people I don't know (all of whom have a drink in their hand and then pretzels in the other hand) is a little uncomfortable for me.  So there you are.  Everybody's got their own "normal," but if you want to make connections, you show people you're interested in them. 

I'm Dr. Laura Schlessinger and it was very nice talking with you but excuse me, I've got work to do. [Grabs cleaning spray and cloth]  It's just not clean in here [begins to wipe down car again].



Posted by Staff at 12:00 AM