May 13, 2011
Saved Me First, Then Saved My Marriage

Hello Dr. Laura! 


Just a quick note to thank you and let you know how you have affected my life. I am my kids' Mom.  I have been stepping for 15 years. I am also FINALLY my husband's girlfriend. After we were together for two years (children were 7 and nine), his ex wife took her own life. My husband and I were engaged at that time, due to be married in a couple of months. I postponed our wedding; the kids had way too much to deal with.  I was 29 and I WISH I would have listened to you then.  It would have saved A LOT of trouble and wasted time. 


We ended up getting married three years later.  He told me after the honeymoon, the kids were "my deal."  So I quit my job to raise them full time.  My husband was very absent for many years.  I cooked, cleaned, went to basketball games, plays, school mass every week -- and I am not even catholic! 


I was a terrible wife, needy, whiney, clingy! A Debbie downer! The more I smothered him, the more he resisted! He had work, golf, bars...I was alone almost every night! NOW I see why he didn't want to be around me -- I was obsessed with him, and very bitter.


One day he came home and I was crying.  I told him I was miserable and wanted out.  Right then my step son came in and said, "Then I am going with you." My husband told me "anyone would kill to live in an 8,000 sq ft house, drive expensive cars, etc...I sold myself out.
 
SO...here's where you come in… One day while feeling sorry for myself, I stumbled upon your show! You gave me strength, and slowly over the years became stronger and stronger.  You asked a woman one time "How can your husband respect you, if you don't love or respect YOURSELF!" OMGOSH...a light bulb went off!!!!!!!


FAST FORWARD four years later! We are happier than we have ever been. I told him four years ago, I will put up with you, but when the kids are out of the house, I am too. I started having my respect. WHY didn't I do this years ago! Guess what? His light bulb went off! 


I started treating myself better.  I listened to your books.  He noticed an immediate change. We started going to lunch together every day.  I would ALWAYS have your show on.  HE started to listen! 


It was a long road: Lots of tears, apologies, fights, kisses, lovemaking… and finally peace. We are best friends, lovers, and for the first time we live alone together!!!  The kids are grown, healthy, and successful.  So at 44 (me) and 52 (my husband) we are like newlyweds.. THANK YOU FOR SAVING my life, and marriage.  We joke now.  My husband says, "I love we got to this place with each other.  I am so happy, and so in love with you.  You were so patient with me.  I always smile and say, "You know who to send the check to. MY Dr. Laura"  We love you -- YOU SAVED US BOTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Sincerely,  


T & T

Posted by Staff at 11:40 PM