August 26, 2010I Blew It with My Blended Family
Hi Dr. Laura,
I have been listening for a long time and often heard you speak about the difficulties of blending two families. The first time I heard you mention blended families don't usually work, I was angry with you, because I thought my blended family was a Godsend. We seemed to be functioning just fine(according to me).
Well, my husband of four years decided to leave me and my daughters 2 weeks ago and his main reason was "I am tired of being neglected". That hit me like a ton of bricks. I thought I had been taking good care of him, and that he had all of his needs met. Turns out, none of his needs had been met. I realize now your stance on blended families was completely accurate, and I felt incredible guilt for causing him so much pain and neglect. It seems looking back, that I could only make one part of my family happy, my children, or my husband. In all honesty, it's not fair to either of them.
I didn't want to let him go, but I see now that it's inevitable. I lost a really good man, and my heart will probably never heal. I made a promise to myself today that I will remain single until my daughters are grown. That gives me about six years to fix what's broken. I will miss my husband immensely, but because I love him so much, I have to set him free. He deserves a wife who can serve him with her whole heart. I wish that was me!
Anyway, my kids and I will carry on and will be stronger and wiser from this experience. I am so sorry I hurt my husband, and also my children. I wish I had a magic wand to wipe away all the pain. Thank you for teaching us the reality of our situation and for bringing clarity to my troubled heart. I love you Dr. Laura.
Posted by Staff at 8:28 PM