April 13, 2016
I'm More Careful About Picking Friends

Dr. Laura:

My best friend of several years had an extremely "off-kilter" personality.  Things that would typically bother someone didn't bother her (and that contributed to her rudeness), and things that typically didn't bother others drove her nuts.  I became the "referee" for others, since I seemed to be the only one who could tell when she was about to "blow."

She was nice and generous, but sharing a friendship with her always came on HER terms.  She called the shots and made the rules.  One "girls' night out," we couldn't agree on a movie to see, and I had an overwhelming sense of "I've had it."  I just said goodbye, got in my car and drove away.  She emailed me saying she knew I'd get over it, but I never looked back.

My husband commented a few weeks later that he was glad she and I were no longer friends, as I wasn't stressed out anymore.  I didn't realize how toxic that friendship was until I was no longer in it.  I had allowed her selfishness to dictate our friendship.  I'm now more careful about who I let into my life, and I'm a lot calmer since making that decision.

Caroline


Posted by Staff at 10:59 AM