I am embarrassed to admit a year into my marriage I became something I never wanted to be - a nag! We had a wonderful marriage during the week while we were working, but on the weekend, my husband would sit down and play more than 20 hours of video games and it caused a fight. I nagged him constantly about it.  When I look back at my behavior, I'm not at all surprised he didn't want to spend time with me.

What bothered me about the gaming was I didn't like working hard all weekend while my husband got to be lazy.  I waited all week to spend time with him on the weekends and instead he ignored me. I finally explained these things to him when we were having a good day.  I was surprised to find out he wished I would quit doing things around the house and come be lazy with him. We had a real discussion instead of a fight because he didn't feel he needed to be on the defensive. Now on the weekends he plays several hours each day and I find something to do curled up against him, like reading a book.  Then we go out and do things together. We're both so relaxed, we can joke around and have fun together.  It really hasn't been an issue since.

When I nagged, I was met with a brick wall, but when I treated my husband like an adult, we were able to make effective changes to our marriage. I will remember that when I feel the nagging monster trying to re-emerge in the future.

Becky