May 7, 2010
Fighting At-Home Frustrations
Fighting At-Home Frustrations By Cheryl Gochnauer Thinking about running away from home? Sit down, kids. I'm talking to your mom. I've been there, Ladies. We all have. So if you're feeling like you're theonly one, and nobody's ever felt like this, and you're the worst parentthere ever was, don't. Let's look at some common triggers of at-home frustrations, and ways tofight them. FATIGUE. Children, especially little ones, seldom give us breaks when weneed them. My girls are older now, but I still remember living fornaptime -- when they were asleep and I could relax! If you're feeling wornout, don't use naptime to rush through chores. Instead, lie down when thekids lie down. Let the whole house get quiet. Recharge your own batterieswhile the kids are recharging theirs. VANILLA, VANILLA, VANILLA. Doing basically the same thing, day in and dayout, gets boring. Try new activities, especially things that get everybodyoutside. Invite playmates over, and allow kids to visit friends' homes.Kids enjoy a change of scenery, and like playing with different toys. Ifthere aren't any families close by, head for the local library, swimmingpool or park, where you're likely to find other little boys and girls readyto play. Do things together as a family that everyone - including Mom -enjoys. WE'RE ALWAYS BROKE. It's true that there isn't as much money to work withwhen only one spouse is bringing in a regular paycheck. But the mainprinciple to hold onto is this: It's not what you make, it's what youspend. Sort "wants" from "needs" and take on a frugal mindset. Don't fallprey to instant gratification, which steals your precious dollars. Paredown expenses. Postpone purchases and use coupons, rebates, and discountstores. Note: If you've been cutting back and still can't make your bills,consider a part-time job. Your kids will not benefit if their parents gobankrupt! NOBODY CARES. If it has been a while since your husband mentioned how greatit is having you home, don't assume he has changed his mind. He probablyappreciates what you're doing, but doesn't think to tell you - the old "Isaid I loved you once; I'll let you know if it ever changes" type. Let himknow how important it is to hear his affirmation, both in talking directlyto you and about you to others. I'M LONELY. While seeking playmates for your children, don't forget to findfriends for yourself. Link up with other at-home moms by joining aparenting group like Mothers of Preschoolers ( www.mops.org ) or Moms in Touch( www.momsintouch.org ) or Hearts at Home ( www.hearts-at-home.org ). Or trademessages at the Homebodies Forums( http://forums.gospelcom.net/view/homebodies ). Interacting with women whohave made the same choices can really brighten your day. I MISS WORKING OUTSIDE THE HOME. Lots of mothers find the perfect balanceby holding a part-time or work-at-home position. This allows them to focuson their families while maintaining skills and professional relationships.Be sure to keep that balance, though. Don't fall prey to the "Attack of theKiller Home Business", which eats up all your family time even though you'reworking under your own roof. Whatever frustrations you're going through, don't keep them to yourself.Surround yourself with supportive people (your spouse, friends and groups)that understand and can encourage you. And when all else fails, turn toyour child for a hug. That's a great way to get back to basics - toreinforce to yourself again just why you made this choice. (Comments? Email Cheryl@homebodies.org or visit her website at www.homebodies.org , where you can sign up for her free weekly emailnewsletter. Copyright 2002 Homebodies.Org, LLC.)Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com

Posted by Staff at 1:57 AM