Three weeks after my 17th wedding anniversary I found out my husband was having an affair with a married co-worker. I was devastated and hurt. I always thought of our marriage as the kind people looked up to. To say I went through a rollercoaster of emotions is an understatement.
Our son was nearly 13 at the time, and my husband begged me for forgiveness. He told me that he would do whatever it took to "right the ship." I thought I could make nice and keep the family together until our son turned 18. He said he wanted to work for it, and I made him do just that. The first thing was he had to meet with his boss and HR and explain why he needed to transfer to a different department. Secondly, he had to go to our family doctor and get tested for STDs. Lastly, we had to go to marriage counseling. He had no problem with any of my conditions, and that was the start of us rebuilding our relationship.
It was a process. We realized that whatever the relationship and marriage was before the infidelity, was gone. We had to let go of what was and deal with what is. It continues to be a process, but we get up every day and put in the effort to make our marriage work.
Our son is now nearly 31 and is happily married. I’m glad that I chose forgiveness, and we are approaching our 35th wedding anniversary this fall.
Rhonda
Choosing Forgiveness Paid Off
How have you found peace in forgiveness? What made it possible to move forward after it happened? Share your story by emailing drlaura@drlaura.com!
