Mom's Resolutions
By Cheryl Gochnauer
The beginning of a new year is a natural time to muse over fresh ideas andcommitments, and the homefront is a perfect place to start. For 2002, I'mresolving to take conscious steps to improve my relationship with my kids,my spouse, and myself.
KIDS, I HEREBY RESOLVE TO...
Catch your eye with a smile and a wink; to prove I love you everyday.
Notice good stuff on your report card first, bad stuff second, and grade itall in perspective.
Be affectionate with Daddy in your presence so you can learn how to treatyour own mate someday. I'll not hide minor disagreements, but will avoidbeing petty so you can learn how to work through conflict while maintaininganother person's dignity.
Encourage you to spend time with your sibling, even if there is a gap inyour ages. We'll discover activities you can enjoy together, and I'll treatyou in such a manner that you'll realize you're both my favorite child.
Resist trying to fix all your problems. Instead, I'll give insight onpossible actions you might take by asking you questions you can answeryourself.
Treat you so you never doubt my love for you, even when I am discipliningyou. I will speak well of you in public, and never intentionally humiliateyou.
Praise but not flatter you, and thereby build in you a fair sense of yourabilities. We'll work together to temper any perceived weaknesses, andpursue your known strengths so that, this time next year, you'll be thatmuch more rooted as you look toward future plans.
FOR MY SPOUSE, I RESOLVE TO...
Make time to freshen up, both physically and mentally, a half an hour beforewe get together after work each day. If that means putting on makeup in thecar, I'll do it!
Monitor your nonverbal signals and avoid being "chatty" if you're not. I'lllet you finish your story of what happened at work, without interruptingwith my own day's crisis.
Resist asking you to fix anything until after dessert. Unless it's leaking.Or smoking.
Spend an evening each week talking alone with you, whether away from home orrelaxing while the kids are out at an activity or with a sitter. I'll alsoencourage you to carve out occasional getaways with each of our children,where they can have you all to themselves.
Encourage you to develop close friendships with other men who share yourmoral values and treasure their families.
Tell you everyday that I love you, and prove it in action and in word.
Remember you'll be here long after the kids are gone, so our relationship isthe most important one under this roof.
AND TO MYSELF, I HEREBY RESOLVE TO...
Do what I can, and guiltlessly let the rest wait. I'll try to be content inwhatever circumstances I happen to be.
Strive to be the best thing that happened in someone's life today.
Keep everything in perspective and not over-react. Unless it's leaking. Orsmoking.
Accept the love of family and friends, and reflect it right back.
Plant happy memories in my children's thoughts, and water them daily withencouragement and humor.
(Comments? Email
Cheryl@homebodies.org
or visit her parenting website at
http://www.homebodies.org
. Copyright 2000 Cheryl Gochnauer.)
Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com
