I agree 100% with the statement you've said, "When tough times happen, you don't turn ON each other, you turn TO each other." My husband is a home builder and in 2008 when the housing market crashed hard, we went through a very difficult time with no "family money" or "investor money" to back us up. It was just us, 5 kids, 9 un-sold, high priced building lots and 2 over a million dollar spec homes un-sold. It crushed us financially. We saw several people in the industry struggle extremely with their marriages and even divorce.
How did we make it through? First, my husband had a severe episode of depression. He was distant, emotionally flat, and mean! I had to go back to work and hope that my husband didn't have to be hospitalized. He was verbally mean all the time and so mad that we all avoided him as if he were some kind of monster. I knew things were hard, I knew he needed me and so I told him I loved him many times even though he really was unlovable at the time! I looked on the bright side; I did what it took to help support the family emotionally and financially.
It took time, but he has changed back into the caring and loving husband and father I knew he was. When I look back on those years of really hard times I know that I made the right decision to love him through it, to get sh*t done without complaining that it's not my job and to turn TO him every opportunity I could find.
I know in the next adventure we will both turn to each other and get through that too. Nowadays he texts me often daily to see how I am, to flirt with me, to tell me how sexy I am and I feed into that and text him back how much he is my sexy big man crush, because it makes him happy and life is good!! If I had given up back when things were hard and simply complained about his lack of love which was true, we would have divorced. I'm so glad we didn't do that because there was a reason we loved each other enough to get married. It was worth putting aside my own feelings and loving him anyway.
Karen
