Dear Dr. Laura,
You recently questioned on-air why some people would adopt overseas rather than adopt within the USA. The answer is simple: it's becoming too difficult, too complicated, too intrusive, and too expensive to adopt domestically and foreign adoptions are becoming more and more attractive.
Most people who adopt want a closed adoption because they don't want the birth parents involved and complicating the issue of who the parent really is. After all, the adoptive parent IS the parent, NOT the babysitter.
However, many birth mothers are now demanding an open adoption including regular contact with the child and regular progress updates. I once opened the yellow pages to the adoption pages and saw a lovely picture of a young woman holding up a two-year-old girl. The caption below read, "Birth mother Jenny holds her two-year-old daughter Olivia during a regular visit with the adoptive parents." The picture and caption soured me on adoptions when I discovered this was increasingly the norm, not the exception.
Domestic adoptions of infants take a minimum of one to two years and can take even longer if you want a closed adoption. You have to welcome into your family a birth mother who may not share your morals and values, compete with other potential adoptive parents for the privilege of adopting her child, give out reams of testimonials and personal history, etc., etc.
By contrast, foreign adoptions are much simpler. You go through the regular social services background checks and take the required courses that are required even for domestic adoptions, and then receive your child in a matter of months, not a matter of years. Best of all, you don't have to entertain the birth family pounding at your door, demanding access to YOUR child.
My personal opinion is the pro-abortion crowd (there is no such thing as pro-choice with that crowd) is intentionally making adoptions more and more difficult. Why? Because adoption offers a viable alternative to abortion. Eliminate the domestic demand for adoption and you eliminate one of the strongest counter-arguments to murdering an unborn baby. By making adoption as difficult and unpleasant as possible helps eliminate the demand for domestic adoptions. You've probably heard of many women who opt for abortion rather than adoption because they don't want the child showing up on their doorstep one day. Many birth mothers thought by choosing a closed adoption, they would never see the child again. Many adoptive parents thought by choosing a closed adoption, the birth family would never interfere. Yet, just a few years ago Oregon passed a law retro-actively changing all closed options to open adoptions in that state and requiring all future adoptions to be open. In other states, court orders have opened supposedly closed adoptions.
Yes, there is a justifiable preference to overseas adoptions.
Sincerely,
Rich
