I think I'm starting to get it. My husband and I are 25 years old and have been married for almost two years, with a four-month-old daughter. He works as a police officer and I stay home to take care of our little bundle of sass. Even before this current health crisis he worked long hours, so he usually sleeps later than me and the baby.
One morning the baby was extra fussy, and I began to build up anger and frustration toward him. How dare he be sleeping! I guess I'll have to do everything by myself. He never helps me! I was slowly convincing myself that I would have the right to become "the b-word" in order to get the help I needed. I was about to nag him to wake up and help me with the baby when I thought "if I do that, I'm CHOOSING to be 'Miss B,'" so how can I turn this around to be The Girlfriend instead? It took me a minute, but I walked into our room, put my hand gently on his back, kissed him on the cheek and whispered in his ear "How would you like your eggs?" I knew the thought of food and the smell of bacon would seduce him out of bed in a more girlfriend-like way.
He was up in two minutes and the best part is that he took the baby and insisted on making breakfast as well. How differently that morning could have gone if I had taken the wrong route! I realize that being "The Girlfriend" is a choice that takes a little more creativity and maybe a deep breath now and then, but my husband slays dragons for us every day with a smile on his face and love in his heart. It's the least I can do. Thank you for being the voice in my head telling me to choose being his girlfriend every time.