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Email of the Day

Don't Give Up

Dear Dr. Laura:

I was married at age 22, had four children by age 29, and divorced at 30.  My husband had an affair and made it clear he did not want to stay married no matter how much I wanted to for the sake of the kids, who were then all under the age of 7.  I want to thank you for the part you played in helping me every day during those hard years when tears were so often my companion.  I chose not to talk badly about my ex to my kids and I put my kids first in all situations.  You were the one who persuaded me to act with dignity, which was hard because I wanted to tell the world what a jerk my ex-husband was.  I didn't.  I decided to let his actions speak for themselves.

I went without the finer things in life - no fancy trips, cars or clothes - in order to stay home with my kids.  I learned that I could do this and be happy.  When I got divorced all those years ago, I prayed that my kids would be okay despite having a crappy dad.  That prayer was answered, and you were part of that answer.  

I want to tell all the divorced moms out there who are in the trenches now as I was, with long nights to get through and tears that fall to your pillows, who go to bed exhausted every night and who feel that there is not a soul on earth who understands that they should not give up.  One day you'll look back and depending on your choices to act with either dignity and self-control or despair and destruction, your reward will either be joy or a whole big world of regret.  I'm proud to say that regret is something I will never have to live with when it comes to how I raised my kids, thanks in large part to you.


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Tags: Divorce, Marriage, Motherhood-Fatherhood, Parenting, Personal Responsibility, Women's Point of View
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