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Email of the Day

I Finally Understand
01/19/2018

I've listened to you for a little over a year, and your comment that not everything can be fixed has really resonated with me.  For a former shack-up honey, divorced mom of two, and remarried woman with minor children, it has taken a lot for me to face what those words really mean.  

My sons are 7 and 12 and bounce back and forth from one home to the other, not having the time or feeling of ownership to settle into either.  I married their father at the age of 22 and gave no consideration to our future.  We never discussed family dynamics, education, religion, finances or even if we loved and liked each other before we married.  Because of that, I realized I married a man I did not respect or love.  I then chose to create not one, but TWO children with him.  I was immature, selfish, and not willing to make our marriage work for the children.  I was only concerned with MY happiness and MY future.  I either did not care to see the life my children would live or I was incredibly young and stupid.

I listen to you now every day, and finally understand that in the lives of my children, not everything can be fixed.  That's a hard pill to swallow.  I can't turn back the clock, but because of your influence, I stay home with them now and do everything in my power to create consistency in our home, and I'm there every moment I'm allowed to be.  Their dad now allows me to pick them up from school, take them to activities and spend extra time supporting him when he has them.  I think of you when I get frustrated and remember that not everything can be fixed, which actually calms me and reminds me that I brought this trouble on myself and them.  I could have made better decisions.  Thank you for helping those who have not yet gone down the road as far as I have.  And I work every day to make the life my kids have the best it can be even under "less than best" circumstances.  

Appreciatively,

Marilyn
Tags: Attitude, Divorce, Parenting, Personal Responsibility, Shacking Up
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