I am 55 and my mother is 85 years old. She was a working mom and was always talking about her great retirement and health benefits. I often heard my father tell her she should stay home with us kids, but she did not do so. We had a nice home and all five children went to private schools, but before we went to school, we went to daycare.
I first went to daycare at age three. I remember crying my head off and wanting my mother. That feeling never went away. When we were older, we kids made the dinner, so it was ready when she and my dad came home. My mom was always stressed out and yelling at us. She didn't know any of our friends or what was going on in our lives. Even as a child, I could see she wasn't a nice wife to our dad, and they eventually divorced. Now at 85, she wonders why her kids don't come around. I care about her, but I'm not bonded to her. I've always been respectful to her but essentially, she taught me what NOT to do.
I stayed home with my kids and I still am my husband's girlfriend. I wanted to let other listeners know that children need their mothers, and the effects of being dropped off at day care last well beyond childhood. Thank you, Dr. Laura - you are tough, and you are