Hi Dr. Laura,
I am 50 years old and have been divorced for 6 years now - we separated for 2 years prior to that. I knew the day I got married I was marrying the wrong man. Unfortunately, I didn't have the guts to cancel the wedding because I felt that doing so would let everyone down. For 14 years, I made the best of it and even had 4 kids with him. I was not happy in my marriage but thought that because of the kids, I needed to stay married and would leave when my youngest turned 18.
The defining moment not to wait was when I got a phone call from my children's' school telling me the police and child services were there on suspicions of child abuse. Sure enough, while I was at work, my husband, who had retired early, was abusing the kids. At that moment, I knew I couldn't wait. When my now ex-husband refused to get help for his anger issues, I packed up my kids, moved out and never looked back. "Daddy" refused to leave the house. For the first few years, it was very difficult financially. However, we got through it and 8 years later my children are thriving.
When your gut says you are marrying the wrong man, trust your gut.