Dear Dr. Laura,
My husband has been a long time listener to your show and now follows you online. We have several of your books, including The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands. When he first brought this book home, I read it but not with an open mind. Looking back, I regret that. My husband and I have been married 15 1/2 years and 2 1/2 years ago I almost lost him. I was not taking care of him the way I should have and he found a sympathetic ear in a friend of ours. She gave him the attention he was craving and on a certain level they shared a bond. I could tell things weren't going well at home so I confronted him and he told me he had found someone to listen to him and make him feel like he had some worth. That was a punch in the stomach! I immediately changed me. I begged him to give me the chance to prove to him that I still loved and treasured him. We had long talks and I found out how beat down and unappreciated I had made him feel. It wasn't so much what I had done as what I hadn't done. I felt like the biggest bitch in the world. No wonder he had shared with someone else. They never had a physical affair, but I'm sure if I hadn't pulled my head out, it would have led to that.
Since then, I have made giant leaps. I have started showing and telling my husband daily how much he means to me. I let him how much I appreciate him and how important he is to me, our kids, and our family. I do my best to make him feel special every day and surprise him with date nights, and "parent getaway weekends". It's been a long journey and I'm lucky he was willing to give me another chance. There have still been ups and downs, but overall we are stronger now than we have been since we were dating.
I'm thankful for the advice in your book and for helping me realize how "feeding" my husband makes all the difference in the world to us and our marriage. I'm proud to say that not only do I treat my husband like a king, but I am now a much better wife and am continuing to grow and be the wife he deserves to have. Even more important, the girlfriend in me has returned and my husband is overwhelmed by all the feedings she's giving him! We are both loving the new playful us.
Thank you for the advice you share. It helped me save my marriage and reawaken the girlfriend in me that my husband lost so long ago.
My husband's girlfriend