It took me awhile to own up to the fact I was a less than great mother to my children.
When I finally did, I sat them down individually and asked each to tell me what were the worst things they felt I did. It was varied yet the most consistent thing was the yelling and emotional abuse. There were some things I didn't remember and some I did. Even when I did not agree, I listened and validated their feelings and memories. It was hard. Very hard. However I apologized sincerely and all of them forgave me. This opened doors for new and healthier relationships with them.
Interestingly enough they were more forgiving than I ever dreamed. Since that time a few years ago, my behaviors have continued to change and improve. I hope this helps them in their lives to learn that owning something is the only way to change it. I am so proud of them all.
D.
