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Letters From Listeners

Paying Attention to my Husband Changed Our Marriage

Dr. Laura,

Your caller has inspired me to write this email to you. She mentioned her husband was been having an emotional affair with his co-worker.

Four years ago, I too experienced that. I was running two restaurants, putting in crazy hours to bring home the money for "our" future. Meanwhile, my husband met a person and was seeing her while I was working, talking to her and texting her. When I found out what he was doing, I was so upset and felt so betrayed. All I wanted was a divorce...after all, I was working so hard for our future.

After realizing I had been neglecting him, this is what changed me from wanting to get divorce to wanting to stay married to him...a daily devotion of thankfulness  I started making a list of 5 things he was doing I was thankful for. It was just simple things such as how he acknowledged me as I walked into the room, how he threw out the trash, how he washed the dishes, etc... And whether he listened to me or not, I would read it out loud at the end of the night to him.

Soon, I was thankful for the smallest things that he did and in return, he wanted to do more things for me so I would recognize his work.

Now four years later, as we celebrate our 8th wedding anniversary, I am so thankful we are still married. We now have a beautiful 2 year old and another daughter on our way. I hope all wives take a moment to thank their husbands for the small things they do.  I am sure their husbands will want to do more for them.


Tags: Attitude, Behavior, Marriage, Respect, Thankful, Values
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