I've been married for 11 years, and I was a stay-at-home mom to two boys, ages 2 and 4. Then I decided to go back to work to pay off credit card debt. Working as a chef, I woke up at 4:30am and quietly dressed my boys for the day. Watching them sleep as I dressed them, my heart slowly broke into pieces. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I took them to daycare and waiting until the workers arrived. There was always a pit in my stomach every time I drove away.
As I cooked at work all day, that pit would occasionally resurface until the day's end. Then I would drive as fast as possible to get my kids back, then repeat that cycle, day after day for a year. That's when I decided that paying off my credit card debt could wait. Why should my children have to pay the price for MY financial irresponsibility?
I quit that job. We moved to Rome, Italy last year to be closer to my sister-in-law and my very ill mother-in-law. I'm proud to say I'm once again a stay at home mom to my boys who are now 4 and 6. All is good again in my soul, although those pangs still return to the pit of my stomach every time I think back to that year I let them down. Thank you for all you do for stay-at-home moms. I'll continue to listen to you from Italy by subscribing to your podcast.