If It's Broke, Don'tFix It
By Erik Fisher, PhD,AKA Dr. E#133;
www.ErikFisher.com
Some of you may be thinking, "Dr.E#133;, you#146;ve got that all wrong. It#146;s supposed to be 'If it ain't broke,don't fix it'." Well let me tell you all, we've got trouble#133; right herein River City#133;with a capital T that rhymes with P#133; (sorry, I digress).But seriously, we do have problems that we need to face in our culture,and consistently we don't face them. We close our eyes, turn our deafear, blame others, play the victim and look to be rescued, and oftenpick sides on issues that directly affect us all that does nothing tosolve the problem. Furthermore, even when we choose to address anissue, we often take the shortcut and expect the best.
So what I want to talk about has to do with integrity and commitment,and if we look around we will see a lack of both in the world aroundus. The best way to understand what integrity truly is, is to look atbuilding structures. When a building is built with integrity,
every part of that building is in line with the other parts from thefoundation on up to the spire on top the building. Integrity alsoextends to the ground that the building is built on. Furthermore,integrity does not only apply to how that structure is built from thetop down, but is it strong from side to side. The reason for structuralintegrity is so that the structure can withstand what life throws at it.
We have all recently been tragically educated on what happens whenbuildings are not built in integrity from what we have seen ontelevision from Haiti. The buildings were fine for what may happen ineveryday experiences and even some hurricanes, but what happened whentheir foundation was shaken? They crumbled like a tower of children'sblock with much greater consequences.
Commitment has to do with how we follow through on decisions, goals,plans and/or intentions when we decide to take them on. Similar tobuilding a structure, if one doesn't see their intention and commitmentto a task through to the end of the construction process, thatstructure will lack integrity. Too many times people may have had thebest intention to build a structure that would withstand the tests oftime, and somewhere along the way, for whatever reason, they lost theircommitment, and we have seen the consequences throughout history.
"So why all this talk about buildings and structures Dr. E#133;? I don'tbuild houses." Well, if you haven't figured it out, we are like ahouse, and we have to recognize that we have to look at ourselves fromour foundation to our top floor and even the ground on which we werebuilt.
In our culture, our families are challenged, more than half themarriages in the U.S. end in divorce, our education system is showingsigns of age and wear, our financial system almost crumbled, ourathletes are doing anything to win, and our political system is rifewith conflict, betrayal and mistrust. We don't have to look far to seethe problems, but what are we doing to fix them and/or rebuild what isbroken beyond repair? To repair our culture, we first have to startwith our "house".
In life, it doesn't serve us to just live and plan for the tomorrowthat brings sunshine or showers. It is easy to show people what we wantthem or ourselves to see. What are we doing to live our lives throughthe earthquakes in life, when everything we hid underground is heavedup to the surface? Have we put the time, energy and commitment intolooking at our own foundation in our personal, parental, marital,spiritual, political life???nbsp; Regardless of how we got here, wehave to be willing to fix these problems, all the way down to ourfoundation. That will be through finding the integrity and commitmentto live our lives to the fullest. So what can you do to do this?
Ask yourself, "Are mybeliefs, attitudes, emotions, intentions and behaviors in line?"
What can you do to get themaligned? Do you need to set goals? Communicate better? Evaluate mycommitments?
Evaluate your personal,parental, spiritual, community, and even political integrity. Are theyin line or do they need to be rebuilt?
Get active in the changeprocess, but know it will take time. There may be shortcuts, but theyoften don't work.
Consider all of the peoplethat are impacted by your integrity and commitment, but also make sureyou make changes in your life for you.
I would ask each of you to lookaround your "house" and see what may be broken and in need of repair.What do you stand to lose if you don't fix it?
About the author: Erik Fisher, PhD,aka Dr. E#133;, is a licensed psychologist andnbsp;author who hasbeen featured on NBC, CBS, FOX and CNN. Visit him at
www.ErikFisher.com
to learn more about his books "The Artof Empowered Parenting" and "The Art of Managing Everyday Conflict orto check out his blog. Permissiongranted for use on DrLaura.com.
