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05/05/2009
What Does It Mean to be a Mom?
Hi. Mother's Day is coming up and I know so many of you are rushing around, thinking about flowers and brunch, and what kind of little gifts to give. But I'd rather you sat back, and thought a little bit more about what it is to be a mom. And I think I have a lot to say about that, because, for the beginning part of my adult life, the last thing I wanted in the world to be was a mom. I was a raging "feminista". And making any sacrifices and turning over my life to raising little kids, as opposed to taking on power in the world, was just, well, un-thought of. And then one day when I was 35, I was watching a program showing a live birth and I found myself sobbing and realizing what was missing from my life.
The first and foremost thing I want to say about being a mommy is that the minute you're pregnant, you have this beautiful sense of your femininity like you've never had it before. Oh, sure, you can dress sexy and do all that seductive stuff and that makes you feel womanly, in a way. Of course it does; I'm not going to deny that. But there's something about, when you reach down and feel your tummy, and it's getting bigger and you're watching your breasts getting bigger, preparing to feed your child, and your whole body is changing and your whole chemistry is changing, and it changes your whole mindset about what's important in life. And suddenly you feel a sense of significance that far outweighs just about any accomplishment you can do out there. You're bringing forth new life and teaching this nascent life how to be a wonderful, happy, functioning human being. It is a sacrifice like no other because you are giving your life totally over to the needs of something outside yourself that you brought into this world.
So when you're thinking about Mother's Day for yourself, or you're thinking about celebrating Mother's Day with your mom, think about how spectacular and miraculous and unique the whole experience is. And how every day of a mother's life, from the day you were a fertilized egg to the last breath she takes...trust me on this one...her thoughts are: how can she make you happier? Keep that in mind when you're just maybe cavalierly thinking of "I'll take her to brunch". Happy Mother's Day, from my heart to yours.
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